February 17, 2011
Joba Chamberlain Only Player in Baseball Not Currently In the Best Shape of His Life

Courtesy of Michael Baron’s photo, It’s come to my attention that unlike every other single player ever, Joba Chamberlain is not in the best shape of his life. The guy’s fat! This brings me great joy I can’t rationally explain. I’m loving fat Joba (unless Joba is once again good at baseball, in which case a fat Joba who is good at baseball would definitely be cooler than a skinny Joba Chamberlain who is good at baseball, making me angry). I can’t explain why I hate Joba Chamberlain. Maybe it’s because Yankee fans — aided and abetted by the media — anointed him the next great pitcher after 24 innings and one run in 2007, or maybe there’s just something loathsome about that guy, or something loathsome about anyone who’s just a little annoying once they wear that uniform.

In any case, I thoroughly enjoyed the Joba sucks era. And the Fat Joba sucks era should be even better. Let the Jabba the Hut jokes commence!

  1. notjustametsblog posted this